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Personally, I’m feeling pretty low.  This is unusual for me, and I’m unsure why exactly it is.  However, last week I was down with a nasty bug for a few days and as well as feeling unwell I also felt, for want of a better word, depressed.  This week I’ve had a mild return of some of the symptoms and with it a pronounced return of just feeling plain rubbish about myself.  Very unpleasant.

I feel discouraged, worried (to no purpose), tired, and everything I say and do is just making me cringe.  Ever wish you could hibernate for a while?!

However, in the spirit of counting my blessings, here’s some of the little and lovely things I’m thankful for today:

  • sunshine (although it’s now waking me up in the mornings before I’m ready to waken.  Got to get some decent curtains in our bedroom)
  • a day off work with my daughter
  • my husband bringing me a paper and a bottle of diet coke for later, before he left for work this morning
  • a fridge full of food
  • a chance to sit in the sun in my kitchen typing this while my daughter watches some CBeebies (that won’t last long though, she’s getting bored and is ready for action)
  • God (don’t always feel his presence but I can look out of my window just now and see buds on our blueberry bush and a dusting of snow on the grass and wonder at this world he made and has placed me in)

I had a horrible dream last night which woke me up in the wee small hours and kept me awake and unsettled, afraid even, for a good couple of hours or more.  It was a relief to eventually find peace and fall back asleep for a while and even more of a relief, in some ways, to find the world full of sunshine this morning as well as sprinkled with snow – two things guaranteed to lift my spirits.

Hopefully I’ll get over myself and be back to normal soon.  Apologies to all – especially those I’m around in person – if I’m not much fun just now.  Joy is currently on hold, but will return soon.

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Yesterday’s blanket of snow over much of Britain has produced a tide of coverage and comment in the media.  I particularly enjoyed reading Stuart Jeffries’ lovely ode to snow in today’s G2 in The Guardian.  It has made me wish I was in London (for once), I’d have loved to see such a magical transformation – not just of the physical landscape but the way people responded to and interacted with it.  It’s funny and very sweet, the way this kind of  ‘can’t go to work or school’ snow brings out the playfulness in us.

Today in Edinburgh the snow has vanished overnight.  People are talking about more coming but I don’t know if I believe them.  That said, it was a treat to see the Pentlands still blanketed in snow as I came home from work a wee while back.spaceball

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